There is a hierarchy of desserts, and I am here to break it down for you.
It is important to note your categories: cookies and sponges, like cakes or brownies; candy, both homemade and store-bought, plus brittle; creams, including ice cream, custard, and pudding; and fruit-based treats, including pies and tarts but not fruit by itself because that it fruit and not dessert. There are winners in each category — for example, in the creams category, frozen custard > gelatin any day — but the only category that can produce an all-over winner is the cookies and sponges category. There is not chance for homemade caramels to beat German chocolate cake, and that’s simply an undeniable truth.
Depending on the day, I’ll normally argue that the top three are classic brownies, chocolate-iced long johns, and yellow cake with chocolate frosting. They each represent a perfect type of consistency, but different levels of chocolate. I’m making myself hungry just thinking about it.
This week the winner was donuts, duh.