You know those online articles you click on before bed? The ones that lead you to another article and another article and another article and by the end you have no freaking idea why you’re looking at ‘31 Things That Are Too Funny For [Job Title You Don’t Have]’ or ‘11 Times [Literally Anything] Went Out of Control.’
Of course you are. I assume that’s how you ended up here. You should probably go to bed soon. (But not yet! Because something exciting is coming.)
A few weeks ago, Lance and I were watching TV in bed before falling asleep, and I started scrolling through Facebook. Facebook brought me to Buzzfeed. That Buzzfeed article brought me to five more Buzzfeed articles. And nestled inside one of those Buzzfeed articles was a link to a less-than-$10 dinosaur-shaped necklace with free shipping.
“Buy it,” I heard Lance whisper. I thought he’d already dozed off so it was mildly horrifying. “Buy it,” he said again, half-asleep with one eye open peeking onto the screen.
“It isn’t even $10,” I said.
He rolled over more. “Did Amazon save my credit card info?”
Long story short, I bought a dinosaur necklace in bed off of Amazon while I was half-asleep and it is amazing. 2016 you guys. Wow. The things we can do.
I decided to dress up the t-rex necklace after finding out at first glance most people thought the necklace was abstract. When I see it, I see a t-rex. Immediately. Always a t-rex. Full-on dino. But word on the street is if you don’t already know it’s a dinosaur, it sometimes looks like a random gold pile ‘o necklace, or non-connected bones à la shit I used to buy when I worked at Hot Topic.
But it isn’t. It’s a dinosaur. And hell, if people don’t know it’s a dinosaur when I rock it with a t-shirt and jeans, who is going to know what it is if I wear it with formalwear? Something that needs to be brought back to life a bit? I love the shape of a fitted blouse and circle skirt, but it can be a little too traditional for my taste. Does anything keep you forever young more than a less-than-$10 dinosaur necklace? Is it not the opposite of stuffy?
How many blog posts can I end saying ‘never grow up’ before it’s weird?